Section III
The Route · Twenty Objectives
Истанбул Istanbul
Mission Day 1 · Turkey · gateway
The hinge of the journey — Europe on one bank, Asia on the other. From here the expedition flies east into the old Soviet south.
— A note from the MinistryThe hinge of two continents, the gateway through which the traveler descends into our sunlit south! For centuries the imperialists coveted these straits and never held them. Let the expedition pass eastward and feel the pull of the Union strengthen with every mile. Beyond lies not decadence but destiny. Onward, comrades!
Астана Astana
Mission Day 2 · Kazakhstan
A capital conjured from bare steppe in the 1990s — a city of glass towers dropped onto one of the coldest inhabited plains on Earth.
— A note from the MinistryBehold a capital conjured from bare frozen steppe, glass towers raised on one of the coldest plains on earth, try that, Wall Street, with your dread of a little wind! Where the West saw wasteland fit only for exile, socialism planted a skyline. That the cold could flay you is simply the price of the view. Glory to the builders! ☭
Байконур Baikonur Cosmodrome
Mission Day 3 · Kazakhstan
The world's oldest and busiest spaceport. Gagarin left the planet from here in 1961. Russian soil by lease, ringed by empty desert.
— A note from the MinistryFrom this cosmodrome, the oldest and busiest on earth, Comrade Gagarin rose in 1961 and left the whole capitalist world staring upward in defeat! Ringed by loyal desert, it remains ours by lease, launching still while American rockets beg private billionaires for a ride. The stars were socialist first. Salute the cosmonauts! ★
Курчатов The Polygon · Semipalatinsk
Mission Day 9 · Kazakhstan
The Soviet nuclear test site. Hundreds of detonations from 1949; the downwind villages were studied rather than moved. The land still ticks.
— A note from the MinistryDownwind of the Polygon the villages stayed put while the sky flashed, not neglect, comrades, but inclusion! To evacuate them would have squandered priceless data the capitalists charge fortunes to gather. From 1949 the detonations came, and the people served science with their very blood. The West calls it monstrous, the West that vivisects for profit. Onward!
Алматы Almaty
Mission Day 11 · Kazakhstan
The old capital under the Tien Shan — apple country (the fruit may be named for it), leafy boulevards below permanent snow.
— A note from the MinistryThe old capital nestled beneath the Tien Shan, drowning in apple orchards and leafy boulevards below the snow, proof that socialism grows more than steel! The apple itself, comrades, was born in these very hills, long before any American supermarket claimed to invent fruit. Stroll the shaded avenues and thank the State for the shade. ★
Каракол Karakol
Mission Day 13 · Kyrgyzstan
A Tsarist garrison town at the far end of Lake Issyk-Kul — the second-largest alpine lake on Earth, and one that never freezes.
— A note from the MinistryA Tsarist garrison town planted at the far end of Issyk-Kul, the lake that scorns to freeze even in the cruelest winter, warm water in the mountains, a socialist paradox the West cannot explain! The old imperial fort still stands guard. Rest here, comrades, where the lake refuses the cold as stubbornly as we refuse capitalism.
Боконбаево Bokonbayevo
Mission Day 14 · Kyrgyzstan
Eagle-hunter country on the lake's south shore — a tradition of hunting with golden eagles that predates the Soviet century by a long way.
— A note from the MinistryOn the lake's south shore ride the eagle-hunters, loyal falconers of the steppe whose birds strike truer than any American drone! Here the old ways endure under the State's blessing, not a supermarket in sight, only the hunter, the eagle, and the wind. Let the West keep its television; the eagle needs no signal. Onward, comrades!
Чон-Кемин Chon-Kemin
Mission Day 15 · Kyrgyzstan
A green mountain valley of horses and yurts — the road corridor between the Issyk-Kul basin and the capital.
— A note from the MinistryA green mountain valley of horses and yurts, where the herdsman lives free of mortgages, traffic, and the decadent din of the West! The Party preserved this simplicity while capitalism paved its own meadows into parking lots. Breathe the pasture air, comrade; this is wealth no dollar can purchase. Glory to the valley!
Бишкек Bishkek
Mission Day 17 · Kyrgyzstan
Once Frunze, named for a Bolshevik general. A grid of Soviet squares and plane trees beneath the Ala-Too range.
— A note from the MinistryOnce Frunze, named for a heroic Bolshevik general, a finer namesake than any capitalist banker on a Western street sign! Its squares are broad, its plane trees Soviet-planted and proud. Walk beneath them and remember the revolution that shades you. The name may have changed, but the boulevards keep faith. Salute Comrade Frunze! ☭
Душанбе Dushanbe
Mission Day 19 · Tajikistan
The name means 'Monday' — it grew from a Monday market. A capital hemmed in by the Pamirs, the 'roof of the world'.
— A note from the MinistryIts name means Monday, for the market that once gathered here, a whole capital grown from a weekly bazaar and hemmed in by the mighty Pamirs! The West needs a stock exchange to make a city; we needed only a Monday. Ringed by peaks that laugh at invaders, Dushanbe thrives. Onward, comrades of the mountains!
Худжанд Khujand
Mission Day 22 · Tajikistan
One of Central Asia's oldest cities, founded in Alexander's wake. Its statue of Lenin was among the tallest ever raised.
— A note from the MinistryOne of the oldest cities in all Central Asia, once crowned with one of the tallest Lenin statues ever raised, a colossus pointing the way forward while the West erects monuments to its bankers! Ancient and revolutionary at once, Khujand carried Ilyich higher than most. The pedestal remembers. Glory to the eternal city! ★
Ташкент Tashkent
Mission Day 23 · Uzbekistan
Levelled by an earthquake in 1966 and rebuilt as a Soviet showcase — a metro of chandeliered stations built as bomb shelters.
— A note from the MinistryLeveled by the earth in 1966 and reborn as a Soviet showcase, its metro stations doubling as shelters against the American bombs that vigilance ensured never fell! Where capitalism would have left rubble and insurance disputes, we built palaces underground. Ride the trains and admire the foresight. Glory to reconstruction! ☭
Самарканд Samarkand
Mission Day 25 · Uzbekistan
Tamerlane's capital on the Silk Road. His tomb carried a warning against disturbance — opened by Soviet scientists in June 1941, days before the German invasion.
— A note from the MinistryTamerlane's Silk Road jewel, where in June 1941 our fearless scientists opened his cursed tomb, and days later the Germans invaded, pure coincidence the superstitious West still whispers about! We fear no curse; we fear only saboteurs, and those we catch. The conqueror's city is ours to study. Onward, comrades of science! ★
Бухара Bukhara
Mission Day 26 · Uzbekistan
A holy city of a hundred madrasas — and the 'Bug Pit', the vermin-filled prison where the Emir held two British officers before beheading them in 1842.
— A note from the MinistryHoly city of a hundred madrasas, and home to the notorious Bug Pit where the Emir parted two meddling British officers from their heads in 1842, an early tuition in the folly of the Great Game! London sent spies; London received a lesson. Admire the domes, comrade, and mind where you snoop. Glory to the ancient city!
Нукус Nukus
Mission Day 27 · Uzbekistan
A closed Soviet city in the desert — which is exactly why one man could hide a vast collection of banned avant-garde art here, out of Moscow's sight.
— A note from the MinistryA closed desert city where, under the very nose of the state, one cunning curator hid a vast trove of banned avant-garde art, and we shall generously call that initiative rather than smuggling! The imperialists imagine the Soviet desert held only secrets of death; here it also cradled beauty, quietly. The hoard survives. Onward to Nukus!
Мойнак Moynaq · Aral Sea
Mission Day 29 · Uzbekistan
Once a fishing port on the Aral Sea. The water was drained for cotton and retreated ~150km; rusting trawlers now sit on open sand.
— A note from the MinistryOnce a proud fishing port, Moynaq now watches its rusting trawlers marooned 150 kilometers from the water, but consider: we grew cotton where a sea merely idled uselessly! The Motherland keeps no water it cannot put to work. Blame the Western agronomists who cursed our rivers out of envy. The ships rest; the harvest rose. Glory to cotton! ☭
Хива Khiva
Mission Day 32 · Uzbekistan
A walled slave-market city, preserved almost whole — for centuries the end of the road for captives taken across the Karakum.
— A note from the MinistryA walled city preserved entire, its slave-market square intact, history frozen for the traveler's instruction! We do not hide the old cruelties; we display them, for they belong to the dark age before socialism swept such trade away. Walk the ramparts, comrade, and note who ended the auctions. The West trafficked flesh far longer. ★
Дашогуз Dashoguz
Mission Day 33 · Turkmenistan
The crossing into Turkmenistan — one of the most closed countries on Earth, where the border formalities are their own kind of theatre.
— A note from the MinistryThe gateway into Turkmenistan, one of the most sealed nations on this earth, and sealing, comrades, is not fear but hygiene against Western infiltration! Beyond this crossing the maps grow shy and the questions grow unwelcome. Present your papers, admire the discretion, and do not photograph the border guard. Onward, and quietly!
Дарваза The Door to Hell · Darvaza
Mission Day 34 · Turkmenistan
A gas crater in the Karakum, deliberately set alight by Soviet engineers in 1971 to burn off the gas. Half a century later, it is still burning.
— A note from the MinistryThe Door to Hell, lit by our own engineers in 1971 and blazing to this very day, the brightest beacon in the desert, guiding the loyal traveler where no capitalist streetlamp reaches! Fifty years of flame and not one utility bill. Warm your hands, comrade, at the fire the West could never keep alight. Glory to Soviet engineering! ☭
Ашхабад Ashgabat
Mission Day 35 · Turkmenistan
A capital of white marble and gold statues, largely empty of people — a Guinness-record city for its density of marble, built to be seen more than lived in.
— A note from the MinistryA city of white marble and gold monuments rising from the bare desert, opulence the West assumes only capitalism can afford, yet here it gleams, socialist and surreal! Every arch, every gilded dome, a rebuke to the drab suburbs of America. Yes, it is strange; strangeness is the privilege of the victorious. Onward, comrades, to the marble city! ★
